By: Stache Staff

Mets Assemble! “Avenging” the Team


It’s been done a few times with Star Wars…which player matches up with which character…with poor Ruben Tejada drawing the short end of the stick when he was labeled as Princess Leia.

Well, with all of the David Wright/Captain America hoopla over the past few weeks, I figured why not fill out the rest of the Avengers squad?

And don’t worry Ruben,  you’re not the girl this time!

ThorCaptain America: David Wright. This one is obvious and pretty much wrote itself. He was the stud of the WBC and when he was pulled, the rest of the team seemed to deflate.  He would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for that meddling intercostal muscle.

Thor: Kirk Nieuwenhuis. That hair. That build. Was there really any other choice?  Plus, who wouldn’t love to see him come up to bat carrying Mjolnir? (that’s the hammer’s name for all you non-geeks)

Iron Man: Jordany Valdespin. Who better to encompass Tony Stark’s cockiness, narcissism and general all-around “hotdogging” (Terry Collins’ words) than this guy? This guy loves himself, posting pictures of himself in various outfits and poses (even in a Marlins hat!). Instagram pics to follow I’m sure!

Hulk: Lucas Duda SMASH!! He’s the biggest guy on the team with the most potential for mashing the ball. Plus he has a quiet shy demeanor off the field, much like Bruce Banner. But the question begs…would we like him when he’s angry?

Hawkeye: Matt Harvey. This one had to be a pitcher in my opinion. Matt always looks so “dialed in” when he’s on the mound, and Hawkeye certainly always looks cool and collected (even when he was possessed by an evil force). Now if Harvey could only pitch at his targets while looking completely in another direction like Hawkeye does…he’d have batters confused from now until the end of his career.

Justin Turner could ROCK this look

Black Widow: Justin Turner. Why? Well, I think this is as obvious as it gets, but it’s because every team needs a kick-ass redhead!

Nick Fury: Johan Santana. The broken down, battle-weary veteran who watches from the sidelines, but used to be a bad-ass at one point in his career. Plus, he would probably look great with an eye-patch!

Agent Phil Coulson: Terry Collins. This guy wears his heart on his sleeve for his guys.  They all love him and would rally around him in a heartbeat if he were suddenly stabbed by Loki with a Tesseract-powered laser spear. Word.

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