By: Stache Staff

You Mad, Bro? Hamels Chokes Against Mets…As Usual

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From SB Nation’s “The Good Phight” Blog:

  • “Somehow Ruben Amaro will be blamed for this rain delay. Because everything bad that happens to the Phillies is Ruben Amaro’s and Ryan Howard’s fault!”
  • Cole needs some pine tar.”
  • Our offense needs to pick it up.”
  • “Nix still sux”
  • Nix knows what its like to suck ass in a big city.”
  • Hamels going for his 100th career win again tonight, in case it hasn’t been mentioned.”
  • I heard he’s going for that next week too. Odd.”
  • Offensive suckatude continues.”
  • I’m really glad my newly planted herbs are getting a good soaking after I spent all that time preparing and fertilizing the soil.”
  • Is it me or does Cole not look too sharp tonight?”
  • NEEDZ MOAR PINE TAR !”
  • more crap”
  • Like this umpire, I would also like to squeeze Hamels.”
  • Would be nice if our offense decided to show up.”
  • FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU”
  • “Well this sucks”
  • How bout you call a constant zone. Jesus fucking Christ.”
  • Seriously…walking the pitcher with bases loaded?!?”
  • “Pathetic.”
  • Now Eric Young, who I did not start in fantasy tonight, will hit a bases-clearing double.”
  • I need Moar alcohol.”
  • Have I ever posted that I hate the Mets?”
  • I loathe the Mets.”
  • I blech the Mets.”
  • THE BYRD IS THE WORD!!!”
  • Mets’ announcers were just saying the ball is not going anywhere tonight, after Utleys line out.”
  • Howard with a surprising hit….”
  • Niese is one ugly motherf*****r. No wonder he had plastic surgery.”
  • oh christ, here we go”
  • This is an alternate universe Cole pitching.”
  • “It’s shitty, cold, rainy April home-debut against the Mets by Cole Hamels. THIS HAS ALL HAPPENED BEFOREAND IT WILL ALL HAPPEN AGAIN”
  • I’m going to watch Deadliest Catch.”
  • holy fucking shit”
  • What did someone say about Deadliest Catch? Sounds like a good idea”
  • Please, god. Just call the game.”
  • Dice-K is exactly what this game needs more of.”
  • Nix still sux.”
  • Cole is usually off his game vs. Mets.”

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