By: Stache Staff

You Mad, Bro? The D-Backs Are Snakebitten Edition


From SB Nation’s AZ Snake Pit Blog

  • “If we’re invoking Return of the Jedi, Then let’s christen the bullpen Endor, home of the Ewoks.”
  • “I’m looking for a spork just in case it gets too bad to watch.”
  • “Three hours of Keith Hernandez. It’s a good thing I have alcohol. The Bolsinger news made me happy when I saw it too. How about a win against this team I hate?”
  • “First pitch and we’re not losing yet.”
  • “The Mets annoncers are the only ones to feel sorry for us so far this season.”
  • “A RUN! We have a score! It’s more than zero!”
  • “what does it mean when you have more of those runs (whatever they are) than the team you are playing early in the game?”
  • “Camptown races…”
  • “so Mets tied it up. Thats fun”
  • “d’Arnaud took that one in the man region. Ouch”
  • “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh /flails arms wildly/”
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  • “It feels like other teams must be giggling with glee at the thought of playing against the Dbacks.”
  • “We are the new METS. oh wait…”
  • “/checks on Suns. Well shit.”
  • “the 4-game mini plan. choose any 4 times to cry in front of others!”
  • “OK that’s it the team has gone batshit crazy.”
  • “I wonder how hard it is for Brenly not to just say “Good god, this is pathetic” during every game”
  • “when you’re in a 1 run game nothing works better than putting a guy in that’s never pitched in the majors. what could go wrong?”
  • “5-2 Mets :-(“
  • “He Should be Ready For The Mets! Mets aren’t better than a decent AAA club. :-)”
  • “This season has been a radio station that plays nothing but Radiohead, The Cure, Leonard Cohen, The Smiths, Stabbing Westward, Joy Division, and that “Gloomy Monday” song that makes people wanna kill themselves”
  • “this season has been a really good radio station? more like a radio station that plays nothing but Nickelback, Greenday and the Offspring”
  • “Opposing hitters when they come to Chase…”
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  • “We need Gordon Ramsey to come yell at these guys. That will shape them up!”
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  • “david wright’s eyebrows very serious stuff there…”
  • “when the best play of the game is a replay from another play from another year…”
  • “‘Dbacks pitching is so bad, they make even Duda look like a competent hitter.’-Mets fan”
  • “Zach Wheeler has such an easy delivery lol Giants”
  • “And that should just about do it. 4-12 baby!”
  • “At least we won’t blow as many saves this year Because there won’t be enough leads to blow”
  • “Well guess I’m going to have a ton of free time this summer”
  • “Lol I thought we’d turn things around. Against the Mets. It’s not even fun to watch at this point.”
  • “And now for another edition of ‘This Game Would Be More Interesting If Previous Half Inning Bullpen Derp Didn’t Happen'”
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  • “its just like Major League 2 the pitching sucks the hitting sucks all we need is Kawasaki and it would be complete”
  • “well, at least we uhhhhh…….nope, I got nothing”

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